Bobby vs. Girls (Accidentally) by Lisa Yee

Author:Lisa Yee
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Scholastic Inc.
Published: 2014-09-06T04:00:00+00:00

Bobby hated field trips. Where did everyone go?

The Jungle Garden was huge. Weird shrubs and sinister vines were everywhere. Bobby hoped there weren’t any cheetahs or apes nearby. Annie had once forced him to watch a scary movie featuring apes who had taken over the earth. It didn’t end well.

Bobby soon realized that if he was going to be rescued, he needed to be found first. That’s when he had a brilliant idea. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the minty muffin. Like Hansel and Gretel, he could leave a trail of crumbs behind him!

When the muffin was gone, Bobby searched his pockets again, but this time he pulled out only bits of lint. As he dropped them on the ground, he noticed that the plants were so dense and the trees were so tall they blocked the sunlight. Bobby began to panic. Maybe no one would find the bits of minty muffin, the scraps of lint, or him — ever.

At last, Bobby stumbled into a clearing. Something smelled bad. Really bad. Like really, really, really bad. Bobby looked around to see if someone had farted. He had never smelled anything that bad before. It was worse than the old lady with the blue hair at church who wore way too much perfume.

Just as he was about to turn on his heels and flee, he saw IT.

The Koloff tree was much smaller than Bobby had imagined. The trunk was yellow-greenish, with layers of peeling bark. Beautiful white flowers bloomed all over its branches. However, according to Mrs. Carlson, the flowers were what produced its horrible smell — and that, Bobby realized, was what he was smelling at that very moment.

Like Bobby’s drawing, the tree looked sad. It probably didn’t get many visitors. There weren’t any plants close by. Even the birds kept their distance. But Bobby was drawn toward the tree. He held his breath as he studied its flowers. Their petals were in full bloom and looked incredibly thick and sturdy, yet soft at the same time. In the center of each flower was a small bulb that resembled an orange JawBlaster candy cracked open. Despite the smell, the Koloff tree was really wondrous, like something out of Princess Becky’s Planet.

If only people could get past the stink, Bobby thought, then they’d know what a special tree this is.

Without thinking, he opened his arms and gave the Koloff tree a huge hug. “Don’t worry, stinky tree,” he whispered. “I’ll be your friend.”

After a moment, Bobby stiffened. The tree smelled even worse up close, but when he attempted to step back, his arms remained tight around the trunk. The harder he tried to get away, the more stuck he got. The sticky stuff was all over his shirt. It was on his arms. The foul smell was making him ill. Scary thoughts began to bubble in Bobby’s brain.

What if no one ever finds me?

What if I am stuck here forever?

What if I have to go to the bathroom?

Why did I drink so much milk at breakfast?

“Help! Someone help me!” he cried.

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